Marriage Counseling

Help for your marriage with the Imago Therapy

A pioneer in the field of couples therapy, Imago was initially developed by Harville Hendrix who published  "Getting the Love You Want" in 1988 and made a huge impact in the field of marriage counseling. Imago is based on both the knowledge and experience that help couples take their deepest conflicts and transform them into deep connection.

Using the Imago dialogue, couples learn more about their partner's emotional history and what the underlying reasons are for things which show up on their disagreements. They begin to understand why what they are saying really make sense in the context of their past.

Arguments between couples can be very intense. Often the intensity of emotions displayed in the relationship seems disproportionate to what seems to be the problem. (Not letting your partner know that you will be coming late home after work for example.) This intensity of feelings is explained by subconscious memories established in childhood when we, as children, felt a lack of love. It does not matter how much our parents strive to love us, their love is never experienced by the child as perfect. In addition, for the young mind, the experience of lack of love is perceived as danger.  Children learn  to protect themselves against painful feelings by developing behaviors that will become their coping skills later on in life. We grow into adulthood with an emotional map of what love is like when it is present but also with emotional scars that are felt when it is absent. It is this emotional blueprint that Harville Hendrix calls the "Imago."

 

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